Vacation

I know, it's been awhile since I wrote,

But you have to understand....I need a vacation,
        so my brain really hasn't functioned properly....for...
                  approximately 3 weeks.

And before that, there wasn't anything horribly worth sharing.

But now, since I need a vacation, it appears
              my whole class
Is taking them and leaving me here in the now muddy state
        where we can't go outside to play
                    and must remain inside these small 4 walls.

Two students have now gone to Disney World in the last 3 weeks.

Well, you can imagine the jealousy this has spawned.

All other students are suddenly "going on bay-cation."

Well one little student, realllllly,  I mean
            REALLY
    wants me to go with his family.

Through the year he has invited me many places, but when I got the email
           Stating they were going to the Caribbean in November,
     I had to inform his mother that in fact, A-Couple-Other-Colors had invited me
               on every other vacation
And THIS was the vacation I had decided to join them for.

Obviously, I was just kidding, and Mom found it funny
   that A-Couple-Other-Colors was so generous in offering me vacations.

Well she must have talked to him, because now he believes I am going with him.

And also, he constantly wants to know if I have been to Myrtle Beach, Minnesota...
        apparently I grew up in the wrong part of Minnesota..
    Where was the beach when I was younger?!

Oh well, Have a good time A-Couple-Other-Colors!  We will see you
          Of course you will be tan while the rest of us
                   match the snow in color!

Your Body's Mouth...

In the Midwest, all things are
         hot
                 Hot
                         HOT
throughout the summer, so when school starts
      you expect children are just used to sweating.

Apparently, for Missing the K Sound,
      sweat is a foreign occurrence.

This was made clear when he came
             RUNNING to me
     in a panic...

"Miss Crazy Young Preschool Teacher,
     my hair is wet!!!!"
           How did that happen?!?!

Well, silly me, I explained it in a way I
               THOUGHT
       he would understand.

"Well, Missing the K Sound, that's sweat.
        Your body is telling you that you are hot.
     Why don't you sit in the shade and cool down?"

What came next was too brilliant for words.

"Miss Crazy Young Preschool Teacher,
       my body can't tell me anything,

MY BODY DOESN'T HAVE A MOUTH."

I could end the story there and definitely get a great laugh,

but it gets better.

Because I, the smart one that I am,
    decided to try and talk him through this one.

"Missing the K Sound, what's this?"
             while pointing at my mouth.

"Your mouth."

"Yes, and that's on your body,
          so your body does have a mouth."

"No, Miss Crazy Young Preschool Teacher,
      your mouth is on your face,
                   NOT
              your body....silly!!!"

No words could escape my mouth
     because if I opened my mouth, the laughter
          would have escaped.

2 Fire Drills

Well,
       officially
                      SCHOOL STARTED!!!!

And like any new year,
             It's difficult to remember these students are closer to 3
                             than 4
       And therefore, can't quite do all my now

                                         KINDERGARTNERS

                can do, which was very clear when we had
Not one
                No sir, one is too easy
        No sir, we are too smart for one,
We need two!!!
                                    Yes two!

Fire drills in our first week of school.


And let the craziness ensue.

We managed to get out of the door in a straight line,
      but once out the door we needed to form a
           big team huddle
Therefore
     blocking everyone else from getting out the door.

Once the traffic jam was cleared, we were on our way again.

We made it to the line we stand on during fire drills
         and began the long wait.
The wait where all fears come out,
      The wait where we think the most dreadful thing
Just MIGHT be happening in the building
         where the pretend fire is burning.

"IS MY LUNCHBOX BURNING?!"

(Not the lunch...the lunchBOX)

We survived the first, but then the second came.

We were napping.

                                           THIS drill was not planned.

All of our shoes were off,
     many of us were asleep.

            Quite the wake-up...
"Get up, we have to go outside for a fire drill."

We made it, with the help of many other teachers...
                But seriously?!

If this is any sign of our year,
         Let the
CRAZINESS ensue.

2 Pounds

As a school with a summer program,
sometimes students who have left in previous years
               come back for the summer.

As a second year teacher
          I love this!

I had many students who left after my first year of teaching.
         They were my first class
               and because of that, they will
FOREVER
         hold a special place in my heart.
And  I miss those children more than words can express.

Yesterday was the first day of summer program.
So yesterday was the first time I had seen some of these children
           in a year.

I had a, now, tall young girl give me a hug yesterday.

And then told me this story, that touched my heart.

She said to me,

"Miss Crazy Young Preschool Teacher,
       I loved kindergarten, but I missed you.
            When I got to kindergarten
and found out you weren't my teacher,
      I cried so hard I lost 2 pounds.
               2 pounds Miss Crazy Young Preschool Teacher,
2 POUNDS!"

As crazy as this story is,
       it brought tears to my eyes,
because I miss those kids too,

EVERY day!

Cornucopia

Anyone who has read The Hunger Games series will understand this reference...
     And yes,
          I am about to make a correlation
              to my classroom
     in regards to The Hunger Games.


In the series, the tributes (fancy word for participants)
      are brought up into the arena where the hunger games will take place.
When brought up, the contestants surround what is called

          The Cornucopia

Which is a metal structure,
      full of different weapons, supplies, food,
          anything and everything the tributes could want.

   They are given a few moments to hear the directions
          and then the alarm sounds.

And when the alarm sounds, the tributes bolt,
         either away from the group
or into the middle
               towards the cornucopia
     where they have spotted "their item"
           the one they feel was placed in the cornucopia
   specifically for them.
         They fight to the death for their item
     and once it is theirs, they feel great, confident,
             and now they are free to run away from the others.

Well, in preschool, large motor in the gym is just like this.

The students line up against the wall,
          waiting "patiently"
    while the teachers throw miscellaneous toys
around the perimeter of the gym.

Once all the toys are out,
     let the alarm sound.
(In preschool this means, a teacher yells "GO!!!")

And off they go.

Bolting with all their might,
     pushing,
         shoving,
             kicking,
                   fighting to the death,
For that item in the "cornucopia"
    That item that was brought out just for THEM.

And once it is theirs,
       life is great.

We have won the hunger games!

Let the playing begin.

Oh....

And may the odds be ever in your favor.

Sticky

So I have had the pleasure of taking a young family to church with me for the last few weeks.

There are 3 beautiful children in this family....

Firecracker (in my class)
Princess (His 2 year old sister)
And Stud Muffin (an infant)

I am learning so much from being with them every Sunday.

But today, I had the pleasure of teaching Princess something
        But only after she amazed me first.

The Crazy 2nd-Year Teacher that I am
        gave lollipops to the kids today (with Mom's permission).

Well as you can only imagine, they got
              STICKY!!!!
Princess wasn't having any of this.

She went to the Children's message feeling sticky
       Returned after it was over with one comment.
                "I need wash hands, I sticky."

After taking a wipe to her hands and removing all sticky-ness
       Princess returned to eating her lollipop
All of a sudden she leans to me and asks the most profound
       and exceptionally observant question.

While pointing to the stick in her hand that her candy is so
       nicely posed on top of, she asks,
"Why this make me sticky?"

I told her that her candy was sticky and it was melting
         and therefore dripping onto her hand.

Princess then told me something too smart...
      "Oh, I put in my mouth and make it stop dripping."

Which is just what she did.

She was so proud of herself that the stickiness didn't intensify
      after she placed it in her mouth.



As a side note...According to Firecracker the inside of the lollipop
was none other than
a Tooshy (a slang word for butt) Roll.

Oh those speech sounds that we haven't mastered at age 5 (as of Saturday).

EASTER PARTY!!!!

Any classroom party brings lots of enjoyment to students,
      And lots of stress to the teachers.

Our Easter party was on Wednesday, and our excitement was high all week
        And remains up there even though the Easter party is long gone...

We all know the importance of using the bathroom in a 4-year-olds life
       No ACCIDENTS during the Easter party
             Cuz if we had an accident,
              we would have to leave the party to change
                   And that is just unheard of and unacceptable.

So we all went to the bathroom,
all 17 preschoolers
Well precious preschooler (see Lollipop Lick) went into the last stall.

I glance at the floor of the stall and see his sandals facing the toilet
           and I just assume that his feet are in his sandals
                      BAD ASSUMPTION!

So when I hear a prolonged grunt
         (clearly a pooping grunt)
Coming from precious's stall, I panicked.
              WE DO NOT POOP STANDING UP!!!!!!

So I asked, what any crazy 2nd-year-teacher asks,
       "Precious, what are you doing?"

Precious responds with the obvious...
           "Poop (grunt) ing"

At this moment I freaked out and lean over to look under the stall
                             This is when I realized why assuming is never good.
          Precious was in fact not in his sandals....
                  or his pants.....
                        or his underwear....

Ladies and gentleman, we have a naked pooper!

Well pooping for Precious is not a short process
                  (Maybe the reason for the naked...getting comfy!)
      so the rest of the class leaves for the party while Precious finished
            and I waited to only hear some unfortunate things.

He informed me when he was all done pooping
    And since he is a naked pooper, he had to get redressed
           Which involved a naked rear end sitting on the floor
                   And while this was occurring, he was dancing and singing
                          "Easter party!  Easter party!  Easter party!"

Well, about 10 minutes later, we were all ready to go
          Only after discovering that Precious "had a lot of poop".

Oh brother!  The things we hear!

Will you marry me?!

Everyone knows that often,
         students have crushes on their teachers
                   but rarely as teachers do we hear about this
until something funny happens.

Peanut-child has always been extremely quiet in the classroom
       other than a few melt downs,
    he always remains fairly calm and pleasant.
Never would I ever known that he finds me very charming.
        (Weird for a 4-year-old...never considered this a possibility)

Well, he apparently was wanting to take his feelings to the next level
        so his mom agreed to let him call "me" and tell me how he felt,
    which is impressive seeing as adult men are scared to take this step.

His mom took her friend's phone and "dialed my number"
    actually dialing her number
            and handed the phone to Peanut-child
She turned her back and pretended to be me.

Peanut-child said,
"Miss 'Crazy-Preschool-Teacher' I am going to marry you
     but I am eating dinner right now so it will have to wait."

His mom said she would marry him (posing as me) so...
     I am happy to inform you all that
  I am engaged to Prince Charming who can't marry me
         until he is done with dinner.

Coffee

A dear student of mine has an awesome mother, who tells her that she should never drink coffee because it will stunt her growth.

Well today, Awesome Mom was brushing her teeth.
            Dear Student asked her why she was brushing her teeth again, AM responded...
                  "Because I have coffee breath."

Dear Student responded...
    "Miss "Young-Preschool-Teacher" drinks lots of coffee at home
            because she doesn't want to grow anymore.
                     If she grew anymore, her head would be in heaven."

Dear Student....that is a very smart answer!

Side Note: I am 5'10"

Spring Forget-Everything-We-Know (Formally Spring Break)

Everyone knows, kids go crazy the day before break starts...
     Just a week ago, they could literally be heard screaming down the halls,
                      "SPRING BREAK IS  HERE!!!!!!!!"

What no one tells you is that breaks screw up a classroom, a school, everything (I may be a little dramatic!)

I remember being a kid, and you couldn't wait until school started back up so you could
        see your friends
             show off your new clothes/tan/haircut/shoes/etc.
                     hear all about their vacation.

As a teacher, breaks mean starting over again.
We only spent the first 3 months of school, perfecting how to walk in a line
     But spring break hit and today, instead of walking in a line, we walked in a bunch
            And when the line went straight, someone always turned left.

And then there are the things heard throughout school...

"Mrs. Teacher-who-makes-everyone-laugh, is "obviously a boy" a boy?  Because sometimes I think HE
           might be a girl."

"I have been sick 60 times today."

"Where did you get your dress?  I really like how crazy it looks." (Kindergarten boy said this).

"Can we turn off the air-conditioning?  It's too cold."  (Mind you, the air conditioning is brand new, first time
               it has been used in the classroom.


And my personal favorite of the day.....
     A boy slapped someone and then lied to me...OBVIOUSLY the cherry on top of a
                             crazy crazy day!  Check back later for my sanity...hopefully the lost will be found.

Lollipop Lick

As a preschool teacher, you get asked many interesting things...

But this question, definitely topped the questions asked in my teaching career.

As a teacher, you lose your voice quite frequently,
     at least as a young teacher you do.

I was having one of those weeks,
   where you cough more than you talk,
       and you can't make it through reading a page aloud without a drink of water.

Of course I am the teacher who forgot the cough drops at home...so I was eating a lollipop outside while the children played happily.  (I know, not a smart idea...only eat when you have enough to share...)

Well, precious little preschooler approaches me, and says...

"Miss "Young preschool teacher who should have known better" (actually said my last name), can I have a lick of your lollipop?"

My response, "No you may not, but thanks for asking."


I should have known better...but I guess we learn as we go,
      at least that's my hope.